I am Too Small

Elias sat on his father's chair in the great Hall, the hall was empty for the most part. He really didn't need to be here all if he was honest. But he want to adjust to sitting on the chair.. it didn't feel like his, it still felt like his fathers. Now when he sat in it he felt to small, as if he was still a child pretending to be Lord. He was sure that was how people saw him when the entered his Hall and saw him. Some even have the nerve to ignore him completely and talk to his Castellan instead.. It was all rather stupid if anyone asked him, none of this felt right.

The many metals of the chain around Iestyn's neck jangled as he entered the Great Hall. When he first took up his station, he couldn't help but think of the chain's constant noise as a human cow bell. Now, some twenty five years later, Iestyn barely heard it.

Dark hazel eyes glanced across the length of the hall. It looked like a slow day. That could change within the blink of an eye, as was commonplace in the days of the Late Lord Oran. A small smile tugged at Iestyn's lips to see Elias sitting where Oran had sat. There was only one thing that concerned the Maester: seeing his young Lord's people addressing the Castellan, and ignoring the filled seat of power before them. Iestyn decided he was going to change all of that at once.

Maester Iestyn stood before his usual seat to the right of the Lord's chair. "Good morning, Lord Elias," he murmured, added a polite bow, and waited for Elias to grant him to sit.

The Maester inwardly bristled at the sight of another visitor lining up to address the Castellan. "You there," Iestyn gestured to the second person in line. "Waste neither your time, nor the Castellan's, and have audience with the Lord of this House, as it should be."

Elias blinked out his thoughts and nodded to Maester Iestyn "Good morning Maester" he returned politely and motioned to his seat on he right. It was that awkward moment when the soldier who got reprimanded seem reluctant to address him.

Elias stood up for a moment and blinked at the Maester and addressed the Hall feeling even smaller. "I know I am young, many of you believe me too young, regardless this is the situation. I am the new lord of this hall. All you have to do is address me as such, My advisors and I will take whatever you have to say into account. But if you don't address me as a lord should be your issues will not be addressed.." he stopped and sat back down again..

"Now please continue" he said to the soldier in front of him. His heart was beating fast and his hands were grasping the armrests. He still felt much to small..

Iestyn took his seat when motioned to do so, and set a piercing gaze upon the soldier that seemed even more reluctant to address the young lord. A slight smile curled the Maester’s lips as the youth delivered his speech. It was a good one, getting to the heart of the matter and insisting on what the young lord wanted of his people... if only the tone carried the amount of confidence needed. Iestyn needed to find a remedy for this, and instruct Elias much as had been done with Connor.

The soldier glanced briefly at the Castellan, who had finished what business the man before him in the line had had. It didn’t escape his notice that the Castellan took the little lord’s words as law and refused to call him forward. He stepped toward the large chair and bowed his head slightly instead of bending his knee. The soldier watched Elias grip the chair’s arm rests, and noticed he boy’s fists barely fit the furniture in which he sat.

“Apologies, my lord...” the soldier began, though the tone of his voice said otherwise, “I bring troubling news: the night guard patrolling the armory has been murdered... and it’s suspected the murderer has also stolen weapons from our stores.” The man took a breath as if he had more to say, then seemed to think better of it and waited for the young lord’s reply.

The dark hazel eyes of Maester Iestyn narrowed. Theft was one thing, but murder... particularly murder of a soldier... it was the last thing Lord Elias needed right now. It was the last thing any of them needed. Iestyn settled a softer gaze on Elias, curious as to how he would choose to act on this matter.

Elias frowned, and resisted the urge to look at the Maester for a clue on what to do, he didn't know where to start. Someone killed one of his men and took their weapons, how should he respond? What should he do first? He knew he had little time to think about it he couldn't hesitate he needed to respond with something and now.

He took a breath, "Maester? I would like you the have a look at the body, I need more information, how the man was killed may be helpful." He voiced, yes more information was good that was what he needed.. He needed something to make sense.

"Soldier? Has Sir Therein been informed? Regardless I would like someone to retrieve him, will need a word with him" he asked wanting the council of the head of the remaining forces.

Still Elias felt there was still more so he kept his attention to the soldier, "What more information do you have?" he asked, he knew this was the last thing his house needed. He was unused to being Lord, his army was small.. his people were obviously unsure.. He had the feeling the killer felt he could get away with it.

Iestyn would not have blamed Elias for looking to him for guidance. In fact, the Maester half expected it. When the look his way did not come, and a decisive form of action was taken instead, Maester Iestyn had to force himself not to smile or indicate any sort of praise until he had a moment alone with the young man. “Very well, my lord.” Iestyn hoped his unquestioning response would be enough of a confidence boost for the moment.

The soldier nodded. “Yes, my lord...” He had been about to leave to retrieve Sir Therin when a further question was asked. The soldier paused a moment and sighed. “While this murder makes it all the more plain, my lord, I’ve also been tasked to report that the army’s morale is low... and no new recruits have reported for training.”

Elias close his eyes for a second trying to resist not to snap in front of everyone, "Everyone's Moral is low soldier, we have lost a lot I know" he said with a sigh. "Bring this message back to your men Soldier, things will not get better if everyone gives up.." he said he could not be expected to fix the all by himself. He didn't want to call a draft on his people to join the arms but the recruits for his hand.. he would have no choice.

"Tell the people they 2 days to mourn, then I expect everyone back to work and reporting for duty.. If they fail they are labeled as deserters.." he said, though the moment he said it he wondered if he was to harsh. But he shook his head and dismissed the soldier, "Off with you then.."

He glanced at the Maester and the Castellen, he shook his head once the people left.. and leaned back in the chair, his face pale. Not sure at all how well or how badly he did in that.

The soldier was silent during all Elias said, his face schooled into stoic neutrality. He nodded curtly, muttered a swift “Yes, my lord,” and made his way out of the hall with a hurried walk.

Maester Iestyn noticed how pale Elias was. This was a lot of stress to place on a young man, but he was the lord and that was the way of things. Fortunately, members of the small council were there to advise Elias and make certain his decisions are enforced. Iestyn leaned forward slightly to check on the young man in relative privacy, even though few people remained in the hall. “Do you require anything before I take my leave to examine the body, Lord Elias?” he murmured.

Elias sighed at the Maester's question and shock his head slightly, he didn't really need anything although he did want to know if he did alright. The job as lord was harder then even he had imagined.. he wasn't sure how his father did it.

"Tell me if I did alright Maester? I feel like I am making everything up as I go" he muttered quietly so only the Maester could hear him.

He wanted to be a good Lord, to do good by his people and his house, he wanted to make those right decisions that made everything well and good. He never imagined there might not be a good option. Only perhaps a lesser of the evils in his eyes.

He missed the days he could just go off with his sister or play games with Torin and Rachel.

The concern-laden, dark hazel eyes of the Maester softened slightly at the muttered reply from Elias. At the end of the day, the young lord was still a boy... a boy in need of guidance and reassurance. Iestyn reached over and patted Elias on the shoulder. "The task on your shoulders is not an easy one, as you've seen, and these are difficult times. I think... given present circumstances as they are... your decisions and words were balanced fairly."

Iestyn stood, preparing to take his leave. "Sometimes, improvisation is a lord's most useful tool, Elias. I should like to think your father's words to the soldier would have been similar. But there will come times when there are no pleasant or good options... in which case the lesser of two ills will be yours to decide."

The Maester sighed, wanting to leave Elias with something more positive to think about. Slowly, Iestyn bent his knee before the young lord. "Know that you are not entirely alone in this. Your mother, elder sister, the small council, and I are all available to guide you, should you seek our counsel. We'll do everything in our power to help you become a fine Lord, you have my word."

Elias felt a little better hearing his father would have made the same decisions, hadn't done to badly then. When the Maester confirmed his thoughts on the job not getting any easier he sighed a little.. The young lord had a feeling he would have to toughen up a bit, or so that was what Sir Therein said. It was not in his nature though, how could he live with himself if he made a bad decision and his people paid for it?

Then he saw the Maester bend his knee to him and made a promise of support to him, he blinked not many had bothered bending their knee to him and he had not said anything not like he had done anything to deserve it yet. It felt odd to have someone he looked up to bend his knee to him, even though he knew it was supposed to be proper custom. Not like he was kind of the 7 lands or anything.

Elias motioned for him to stand and he stood as well "Thank you Maester" he replied quietly. He kind of knew he had the support already. But to have it declared and swore like that it meant a lot to him to know it was real. "Your support is much appreciated"

Iestyn stood when motioned to do so. In another ten years or so, he would require a walking stick to get up and down from bending his knee. For now however the Maester was capable of doing so on his own. He noted the mild surprise and a degree of relief on Elias's face. For today, it seemed, Iestyn had done his job well. If only the days ahead would be just as fortunate...

Hazel eyes swept the hall for any remaining business. Upon finding none he walked with Elias out of the hall. "I'll have concluded my examination of the body before the day is out, and a report written before nightfall. Until then, and until Sir Therein arrives, I urge you to find some task you enjoy. Music, perhaps?"

Elias nodded at the thought of going to play some music for a bit, it always relaxed him in the past. "Very well, Thank you Maester" he said in understanding and nodding his head to the older man as he left.

Elias turned to leave he nodded to the Castellan "Let me know if anything more comes up that requires my attention.. I will be in the Grove until the evening meal if nothing more arises" he addressed before leaving the for some precious time to himself.

The Grove was a garden in the back of the Family Manor as children they used to play in it all the time, now a day mostly Torin and Rachel use it now. But for the moment it was empty as his siblings were all in lessons. He took out his Lute and started to play a song his father had once favored..

* * * A Few Hours Later * * *

It took Maester Iestyn some time to examine the body. Although time was of the essence, he would not be performing his duties as Maester if he was not thorough with his work regardless of how bloody or gruesome it got. A young page still learning to read and write watched as a scribe took Iestyn's remarks down in quill and ink, though the boy looked as though he wouldn't last much longer before emptying the contents of his stomach.

"...'So concludes this: the examination of the mortal remains of Sir Galen, Son of Charles, to be sent to the village of Eastlake for burial.' ... I'll take my own signature to the documents, Ignatius, thank you. You and Young Raphael are dismissed," sighed Iestyn, wiping his hands of the last traces of blood. The page stood up and bolted out of the room as soon as the Maester bid him release from his duties, and the scribe followed suit at a slower pace... though not before performing a self-blessing upon catching sight of the deceased.

Iestyn rolled his eyes at the superstition and cast the bloodied towel into the fireplace. "You may escort the body to Eastlake; there is nothing more to be learnt from observation, save the rate of decomposition and putrefaction..." he muttered, summoning the pair of guards at the door.

Hazel eyes fell to the pages of documents, scarcely paying attention to the guards as they carried the body away. Iestyn picked up the parchments, reviewed the writings, and signed his name to the end where his signature was meant to go, followed by the signature and seal of the current Lord. Without a word Iestyn straightened the papers, rolled them up to keep the contents private, and made his way to find Elias.

* * *

Iestyn had entertained the possibility that his Young Lord may have gone to The Grove, as was common for all Silvertongue children - and sometimes the adults - when in need of a place to play or quietly think. By the time he had arrived, Torin and Rachel were engrossed in a game of hide and seek... and Elias was not among them.

For someone who had traveled the Silvertongue mansion several times in his decades-long tenure as Maester, it took Iestyn no time to go from The Grove straight to the chambers of Elias. A single guard stationed beside the archway made it all too clear that the room was occupied. Iestyn rapped his knuckles upon the strong wooden door three times.

Elias was inside his Quarters and his twin sister Elizabeth was inside with him, "Elias, you have got to ask the Maester for something, a tonic or a herb, something ever since you became Lord.. You're... well I am worried about you brother.."

Elias sighed turning his head away at her concern, Everything just felt so heavy with his father and Brother gone and with everything mounting it was making him ill to his stomach, "Things will get better Lizzie I am just not used to being lord yet..I'll be fine" he paused in his words at the knock on the door. He stood and straightened himself before allowing entrance.

"Come in.." he said in a calm voice.

Elizabeth didn't bother straightening herself, she looked decent enough, sitting at her brother's desk but more or less waited to see who it was at the door first. She was hardly in the best mood with all that was happening and she was worried about her brother. Apparently being Lord wasn't good for him, she had caught him getting sick to his stomach in the Grove and snuck him back to his room to clean him up and try to talk some sense in to him and ask the Maester for help. But the young Lord refused saying the he could handle it himself.

At the reply, Iestyn let himself into the chambers. His eyes first settled onto Elizabeth, and then to Elias. The young man looked paler than he had in the great hall. A glance around the room made the Maester question his memory: it could have been the lighting, or the time of day... or he had simply not been paying attention previously. Either way, he would find out soon enough.

"Lord Elias, I have completed my report on the murder of Sir Galen," he began, flicked another glance to Elizabeth, and decided to continue. "Have you received counsel from Sir Therein on the investigation?"

Elias sighed at the question and nodded but he didn't look to satisfied with what Sir Therein had to say.. "He did.. but he didn't tell me much, saying there was little to go on without your report First.. though also saw fit to say it was likely the work of a desperate man who thinks the Silver throne is done for when the Frosts get here.." Elias replied with a hint of buried frustration under his voice.

"From the tone in his voice he seemed to agree with that statement" he added softly, it felt odd hearing one of his own Knights peg him to be murdered by their rival upon their meeting.

" He had no right to say that, Elias" Elizabeth protested, upset to see her brother in such a position, and the effect it was taking on him.

"Shush Lizzie.." Elias returned, not wanting to talk about it and nodded to Maester Iestyn. "What do you have to report Maester?" he asked as he motioned to another seat by his sister for the Maester to sit if he wished.

Iestyn listened closely as Elias explained the encounter with the knight. Ebony eyebrows furrowed, and his lips drew themselves together into a thin line - in years before this was the look he would set upon Micah for misbehaving during lessons. "Your sister has a point..." the older man began, taking the seat that was silently offered to him. "Knights, much like Maesters, are sworn to serve the Lord of a House... ideally without question."

The Maester sighed at the question returned to him. "It's my regret to say that this looks like the handiwork of an individual who may indeed have been desperate. The primary wound was cut hastily; presumably in a panic. It could even be possible that it was an accident, though I find that highly unlikely. ...Our suspect inflicted further, more lethal wounds; possibly to prevent Sir Galen from being treated and naming his assailant.

"From my analysis, we are likely looking for either a low-ranking soldier without much experience, or a butcher. However, the relatively unarmed Small Folk should not be above our suspicion on this, either... particularly if Sir Therein has been making his opinions public." Iestyn scowled at his own afterthought, not liking the implications and possibilities in that particularly tangled web.

Elias sighed but remained silent as the Maester gave his report and it didn't make him feel any better at all. He could not help the way Sir Therein felt, the knight was honest with him, could he really ask the man not to be. And as it turned out the man had been right in his profiling even without the Maesters report.

"You are saying it could be any of my People.." he muttered softly and bit his lip, after thinking for a moment he continued.. "Tell Sir Therein your Report Maester... He still leads this investigation and despite his feelings towards me he was right. Let everyone in the town square know they are to cooperate with the investigation" he instructed even though he had many fears going through his mind and felt ill again. It seemed more likely whoever did this could do so again.. considering he had no army he couldn't deny new recruits their training or their access to their weapons. And with the pressure of the Frosts coming to their very door step it was more and more likely someone else could follow suit and take matter to their own hands..

Elizabeth looked at her brother in worry, she noted he had gone pale again and went to his side, "Elias? are you alright?" she asked placing her hand on his shoulder and looked at the Maester then back to her brother..

Elias let out a shaky breath yet refused to answer her, if he dared to he feared he would fall apart. He didn't look the Maester in the eyes for if he did he was sure the water in his eyes could be seen and would be humiliating.. The lord crying in front of his Maester and sister.. The he need to look even more pathetic was if his mother came in and saw him like this and coddled him.

Iestyn remained silent as his Lord spoke. "Very well, my lord," he said once the young man had finished. It was almost painfully obvious the Maester that Elias had gone pale again. When the younger man refused to answer his sister, the Maester stood up and began preparing tea.

"It is no shame to admit the burdens of lordship are many, Elias," Iestyn sighed, not entirely certain how to advise the young Lord. "Your father confided a great many things to me, in private, during his time. Anger... Upset... even tears, though rare and only in the most dire of circumstances. I invite you to do the same... I will look upon you no differently."

Once the tea had finished steeping, Iestyn added a few leaves of mint and presented the cup to Elias. "Drink this. It will settle your stomach and calm your heart."

Elias took a sip of the tea and sat on his bed next to his sister, The tea did indeed help his stomach though he still felt lost.

"What am I supposed to do Maester? My people are scared and taking matters into their own hands.. if this spreads chaos could ensue.. but it feels like I am not even being given a chance here.. Father and Connor.. were so strong.. People looked up to them.. then they look at me with no hope at all.. It is like my very presence on my fathers throne makes people loose faith" he said in frustration wishing his people would give him a chance before taking up arms..

Elizabeth wasn't really sure what to say, her first thought was to go out into the square and give the whole town a lecture and how they should support their new lord.. but she wasn't sure it would help Elias exactly. So she hugged her twin instead and glanced at the Maester for his thoughts on what Elias said.

Maester Iestyn sighed and listened to Elias's worries and frustrations. "Your family still govern the laws of this land. The people must not be allowed to do as they will, without order... but if you'll forgive the redundancy, Riverstone's need for mutual support between the people and their lord is crucial.

"My three main priorities would be finding the murderer - which Sir Therein is working on; quelling the fear of our people; and contacting any and all allies that could give us aid. Anna's marriage to Lord Zevrion of Whitewood, also proclaimed Lord at a young age, places her in a unique position to request his help on our behalf. Your mother could see to contacting our allies, while we tend to the people."

Dark eyes glanced between the twins. It was a scene the Maester was all too familiar with: Elias feeling miserable, and Elizabeth doing all she could to comfort him. The young man's tendency towards sickness was legendary, but always curable. Iestyn hoped the same would come about of this situation. "Regarding our townsfolk, I would suggest an open forum in the square with as many of your supporters as we can muster to stand ready with you. The people should be reminded that we still have allies, and that not all strength is derived from violence."

Iestyn's attention wandered momentarily to fix itself on Elizabeth. "You've charged yourself with caring for the young Squire Nighthook. How goes his recovery?"

Between his sisters comfort and the Maesters suggestions Elias started to feel a little better again.. just when things seemed bleak.. it was so hard to remember there was support still out there, with a deep breath he spoke still feeling silly for breaking down like that. "I will arrange for a public square meeting in a weeks time.. perhaps some news will have shown before then." he said hoping he had more to tell his people at the meeting in the time he set. Give the families allies time to respond as well.

Lizzie looked up as the Maester soon as Elias looked like he gained some fire back in his eyes and she smiled slightly at the question directed to her. "He is awake and eager to get back to his feet Maester.. I was thinking of asking the craftsman to make him a cane so he can get around when he is a bit stronger" she said with a thoughtful look on her face. "Do you think he might make a full recovery Maester?" Elizabeth asked, she was full of hope for her friend.. hope that he might return to his former self.

It was no surprise to Elias that Lizzie had taken care of Emery like that, his sister had feelings for the squire for sometime.. she never said anything or acted typically like she did.. but he could always tell. So he listened for maesters answer as well.

Iestyn nodded when Elias made his decision to hold a meeting in the square. At the back of his mind he had the feeling that perhaps such a meeting would not go as planned, but he refused to voice such a thing. A lot could happen in a week's time... perhaps just enough to give Elias the morale boost the whole of Riverstone so sorely needed.

Dark eyes settled upon Elizabeth as she asked her questions. "The fact he is eager to get back to his feet is promising... but until I've examined him again I cannot say for certain. Regardless to the amount of recovery, I'm certain the Squire will appreciate having a cane made for him."

The Maester sighed. His usual duties combined with the murder case had caused him to neglect examining Emery regularly. He knew the squire was in good care in Elizabeth's hands - surely if something had gone wrong beyond her skill to tend, she would be the first in flight to fetch him.

Iestyn glanced at the amount of tea in Elias's cup as furtively as possible. Elias seemed to have more strength now than when the Maester had first arrived, and for that Iestyn felt great relief. "Do you require anything further at this moment, my Lord?"